Carrying the torch in 2020...

For my entire career as Engineering Secretary Extraordinaire, something peculiar happens from circa 2 p.m. until 3 p.m.  I laugh.  Most days it's a smallish laugh...like something will tickle my funny bone.  Some days I laugh outloud for nearly the whole hour.

I'm not sure why this happens.  It just happens.  An unexplainable phenomena.  Monday through Friday.  

Today I had an episode.  

As you know the Olympics are scheduled to begin in Rio starting on August 5th...which just so happens to be in 4 days!!!! * Humming the Olympics theme *

Today - since I had Olympics brain - I started contemplating what it would take to train to carry the torch in 2020.  

 
It's so weird that in 4 years, it will be 2020.  Twenty-twenty!!!  It's just craziness.  I mean that's totally visionally acceptable and the goal when I get fitted for contacts...but to say that the date will be 2020 seems unbelievable!!!

 Ok - so about this Olympic training...

I figure with enough hours at the gym with DeDe, surely I could attain torch-bearing status...but would I want to carry it alone?  I mean what if I carried it for some distance and I were to run past a gigantic Goodwill in a hipster neighborhood?  Could I just keep running and not stop to thrift?  Or what if I passed a cool coffeeshop and coffee sounded good?  Can you take a torch inside a coffeeshop?  I feel like if I were to do this that coffeeshops and thrifts would soon have "Anti-torch" signs on their doors...and I would be the reason behind said signs.

Around 2:10, I determined I should bring a friend or two.  The first two to pop into my silly pipe-dream thought were Sara and Lori.  Yes, they would totally hold the torch while I thrifted and/or ordered us coffees as I would hold the torch from them.

Then I got to thinking...do all torch-bearers run because I don't run with an open flame!  {Those last 4 words were unnecessary.}  

Do you begin training for the torch carrying by walking around super fast with unlit taper candles...and then upgrade to lit tapers...and finally some type of smallish torch device? 

Is power walking with the torch acceptable?  

Could I rent a scooter and scooter with the torch?  Scooter speed does not strike me as blazing!  Blazing -- hahahahahahaha - like a flame!!!!  Blazing!!!!  I wasn't even trying to be funny!!!!!!  But seriously - are scooters able to achieve a speed that would blow out a torch?  It seems like the power of the torch's flame would prevail! 

I have friends who will power walk and/or scooter with me so I'm hoping that's a real thing.

Better yet - could we just transport the torch in Rosie?  Not in-in Rosie...as she has fabric-covered seats and fabric on the roof.  It seems like that might be dangerous to have an open flame.

Tonight before VBS crafts, I was telling Rhonda about my torch-bearing thoughts.  She volunteered to help us carry the torch.  She said when we thrift, we could get some type of tiki torch holder or a garden gnome to hold the torch while we search the racks for Anne Taylor.  Genius!!!!  I was thinking we could take the garden gnome to the next level by taking a pottery class and painting his tracksuit GO TEAM USA colors.  It seems American.

Yes...I solemnly swear that these were my random torch-carrying thoughts.  Said thoughts lasted from 2 p.m. until 3 p.m.

My poor new co-worker and new boss have only known me as glutened-Angie.  Glutened-Angie is quiet and miserable feeling.  Glutened-Angie has limited random thoughts between waves of brain fog.  Glutened-Angie does not laugh between 2 and 3 p.m.  Glutened-Angie is sad.  

I'm pretty sure they are not sure what to do with me...especially today.  Tomorrow I need to 'xplain about 2 p.m. and apologize profusely.